How to Build a Sue
by X-Cubed
Summary: A little drabble on how to build yourself the ideal Naruto Sue. Crack and poking funs at Sues abound.


The Sue is a magnificent, abundant creature in this world of fanfiction. She comes in many shapes and colors, from various countries and continents. Yet, she's so often mistaken for that other twittery creature, the original character. So in an attempt to remedy this, we bring you this spectacular new device. It's shiny, has all the bells and whistles you could ever hope for, and is a limited time offer only. May we present: The Sue Builder. Follow the step by step instructions closely to assemble your own personal Sue Builder and get to creating.

Let's start with the basics. First you need a body for your Sue. This is where the Super-Duper Clayanator Sue Mold™ comes into effect. Just simply pop your clay into the mold and a perfect Sue body will emerge within minutes. She will have a tiny heart shaped face, guaranteed. Her body will be firm, yet delicate thanks to our superior scientists who have worked on a new type of flesh like substance. Just look at this mold. It's guaranteed to give a tiny cinched waist for that ultra-attractive femme fatale look. Just crank the Mamgla™ knob on the side of your Sue Builder to adjust the size of your Sue's most famous asset, her chest. Chest sizes range from a perky, loveable B cup to the full sexiness effect of E cups. Never crank your knob to the far right, as this results in an A cup, which is just not sexy and Sue like. Also, never crank it to the far left, as this results in a triple M cup, and your Sue will fall over upon standing. Hips and buttocks will be nicely rounded and toned, though through extensive experiments, we have noticed that all hips and buttock sizes are adjacent to the size that you indicated on your Mamgla meter, giving a sometimes odd Coca-Cola bottle effect. Take extreme caution in making your creation, though of course, if you fail, you can always hose down the first body and start over again. Replacement dough costs $215 pounds an ounce. The clay is flawless and comes in a wide array of charming colors, ranging from Alabaster Pale, Peaches and Cream Health, Creamy Caramel Mocha, and Hot Chocolate on a Cold Day.

Once you have your basic body type down, you must have an interesting hair style. Simply detach and pop your creation's head into the handy StyleOMatic® attachment and click the button next to the hair style choice you would like. Styles range in color and length. More popular colors include raven or ink black, glistening golden blonde, brilliant multifaceted brunettes, Fire Engine red, or more unique choices such as cherry blossom pink, sky blues, succulent silvers, and glowing greens. The most popular styles to date are the flowing waves, The Lady Gaga hairstyle, short and spiky, or mid-length and tousled. Make sure you choose your style wisely, as it will be described in flowery mushy detail copiously in writing.

Once you have chosen the appropriate hairstyle, it is time to put a face on your lady. This is where the real fun begins. You have full creative license to make your lady into the sexy/cute/adorable girl she was always meant to be. Simply click the buttons on the MICRO attachment of your Sue Mold™ for the selections you want and slam her face down into the mold. Her eyebrows will come out perfectly arched, never unibrowed. Her lips will be full and kissable, in a delicious array of colors, such as soft pinks and peaches, to drastic reds and purples. They will never chap or peel, need lipstick or lip-gloss. Her nose can perky cute and button like, long and aristocratic, or slightly crooked yet charming. Her cheeks will be either rosy or deadly pale. Freckles and beauty marks can be added at will. Eyes, however, are hugely important. They will be deep and pool-like, shiny and emotive. They can be any color in the rainbow, and a few not in there. However, they must be limpid or passionate. They must be described often as conveying all emotions and must make males fall over themselves by the pure come-hither looks.

Now you have a full Sue. However, she is still naked. So have fun dressing your Sue in the many revealing or sexually charged clothing choices that are available at any of our facilities for a low cost. Paint her nails, blow in her ears and hear the wind whistling out the either side. Have fun and enjoy your Sue.


End file.
